August 22nd, 2011


 Title: Rescue Him!!
Author:  Iantosdreamer46
Rating: R, adult themes, occasional language,
Pairings/Characters: Jack/Ianto,  Gwen/Rhys, Tosh/Owen, The Doctor, John Hart
Spoilers: None that I know of
Summary:  Ianto has to rescue Jack with help from an old friend.
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters, they belong to RTD and the BBC.  I am just experimenting with them....
Written for the longliveianto bingo: Time Travel - 1375 words


Ianto woke with a thumping headache, he reached over to Jack but he wasn’t there.  “Jack you in the bathroom?  If you are, bring me a couple of aspirin please.”

No answer.  Maybe he was making the coffee?  Ianto couldn’t understand why he’d got a headache.  He very rarely suffered with them.  The only other time had been when they’d had all that trouble with John Hart and Gray.  No!  It couldn’t be, could it?  Ianto was worried now.

He phoned Gwen.

“Ianto, what’s with the early morning call?  I thought you and Jack were off today?”

“Yeah, so did I, but he’s disappeared.  He’s not with you is he?”

“No, sorry, haven’t seen him since yesterday.  Don’t worry, he’s probably just gone for Danish.”

“Yeah, you’re right, thanks Gwen.  See you tomorrow.”

“No problem Ianto, bye.”

Stop worrying Ianto, Jack’ll be back in a minute.  He was making his way to the bathroom when his phone bleeped with a text message.  Thinking it was from Jack he raced back to the bedroom and flipped it open.  His breath caught in his throat.  No, it couldn’t be, not again.  He read it morning eye candy!  Are you lonely without Jack?  Well get used to it, he’s mine again!”

Ianto re-read it, not believing it.  He had to find a way to get Jack back.  The rest of them would know.  He phoned Gwen back and told her what had happened, then he phoned Tosh, knowing Owen would be there, and told her what had happened.  He asked them to meet him at the Hub and someway they would figure how to get Jack back.

They had been sat discussing different ways for over an hour when Tosh’s monitor began bleeping and flashing the ALERT signal.  She went to check what had come through when a video message popped up.

“Well if it isn’t the cute Toshiko, how are we today?  Well, let’s not waste time with idle chit chat, where’s eye candy?”

“I’m here, what in Hells name are you doing?  Where are you and where’s Jack?”

“Questions, questions.  So many questions.  Jack’s with me safe and sound, now you didn’t think I’d hurt him did you?  No, how could I hurt my lover?”

“What do you mean you bastard?”

“Oh fighting talk eye candy.  Now listen carefully, I don’t want to have to repeat myself.  Jack’s back with me.  He’s going to stay here, he’s decided that I am the better lover and doesn’t want you anymore.”

“Let me talk to him, please.”

“Oh not so fast, he’s a bit indisposed at the moment, positively tied up and can’t get to the phone.”

“Hart you get him back here now and we can sort this out.”

“Don’t think so eye candy.  He’s made up his mind.  Oh must go, my lover awaits.  Bye!”

“Hart, NO!  Jack, Jack!”  He couldn’t contain his anguish any longer.  He broke down, sobs wracked his body.  Tosh went and put her arms around him.

“What….what am I going to do without Jack?”

“Hey come on Ianto, we’ll get him back one way or another.”

Owen was making his way up to Jack’s office to look for clues, anything to get him back, when a familiar sound reverberated through the Hub.

“How does he know when Jack’s in trouble?”

“I don’t care as long as he can help us.”

Ianto raced up to Jack’s office just as the Doctor was exiting the TARDIS.  “Doctor, please, Jack’s in trouble and I need your help.”

“I know, Jack was able to get a message to me as he was being taken.”


“Years ago I tweaked his wrist manipulator and he just has to press a couple of buttons and it lets me know he needs help.  As I know how much you both mean to one another, I thought you’d like to come with me to get him.”

Ianto didn’t hesitate, he was in the TARDIS before the rest of them could blink.

“Come on then, where are we going?”

The others were shocked when the Dr said “as far as I can tell, Hart’s taken him back, or should I say forward to the 51st Century, to when they were together.”

Tosh saw the look on Ianto’s face, “don’t worry, Ianto, you’ll get him back, he loves you.”

“Thanks Tosh, we’ll see you soon.”

The familiar sound of the TARDIS dematerialising told them Jack would be with them again soon.


The Dr and Ianto stepped out of the TARDIS hoping they were in the right place.  The Dr had taken rough co-ordinates from Jack’s signal.  Making their way along a corridor they listened out for any movement or sound.

At the end of the corridor was a door.  Ianto ran the last 200 yards and peered through the window.  Handcuffed to the bed was Jack.

“Doctor, he’s in here on the bed.”

“Oh please, what’s he doing waiting for you?”

“No, really, he’s handcuffed.”

“I don’t want to know what you two get up to in your bedroom thank you.”

“No, Doctor, you’re not listening.  Hart’s got him restrained.”

They listened for movement in the room and down the corridor.  Nothing.  They pushed the door open, Ianto went straight to Jack and kissed him.

“I missed you this morning cariad.  I had something for you.”

“mmmm, can’t wait to get home for you to show me.”

“Erm….there are others present here you know!”

“Hi Doctor, thanks for bringing Yan with you, I missed him.”  Ianto bent down and kissed him again.

“Please, can that wait till we get you both home?”

A sudden banging of the door alerted them all to another presence in the room.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t eye candy and his little friend.  Oh have you come to rescue Jack?  I don’t think so!  Like I told you, Jack wants to be with me.”

Ianto held on to Jack’s hand and squeezed it as he bent down and kissed him passionately.

“Oh what have we here?  A final kiss goodbye?”

“No, it’s a kiss that says I love him and he loves me.”

Ianto went to try to undo the handcuffs, but as he turned his back on Hart, he shot him.  Ianto fell to the floor, blood pouring from his back.

“IANTO!” screamed Jack.

“Oh very touching.  Now you’ll have to stay here with me.  I’ll look after you.”

Both Jack and the Doctor realised that Hart had forgotten the Doctor was in the room, he was so focused on Jack he didn’t see him grab the chair and smash him over the head.  Hart fell to the floor – out cold.  The Dr went to Jack and undid the handcuffs.  Jack raced over to Ianto and cradled him and rocked him until he came back.

“Aaaarrrgh!  JACK!”

“Sssshhh my love, don’t speak.”  He leant down and kissed him.

“Oh please, can’t you two ever wait?”

They looked at each other and laughed.  Hart began to stir, but before he came fully round, Jack and the Dr had got him handcuffed to the bed.

“Nnngh, what the hell?”

“Oh dear, have I disappointed you?”

“But, but I shot you!”

“Have you forgotten, I’m like Jack now.”  Ianto grinned and went and put his arm around Jack’s waist.

“Aaargh!  I’ll get you back Jack, one day.  You’ll realise you can’t live without me.”

“No Hart, that’s where you’re wrong.  I can live without you.  You see, I live with Ianto.  We have our own house and where we were just a bit of fun, Ianto and I love each other.  We’ve told you before to leave us alone, now I’m going to make sure you do.”

Jack opened his wrist strap, pressed a few buttons and Hart began to disappear.

“NO!  Jack, please, anything but….”

They didn’t hear what Hart said because he’d gone.

Ianto put his arms around Jack and kissed him again.

“Ok boys, enough.  I’d better get you home.  Then you can show each other how much you were missed.”

Pulling apart they looked at each other then at the Dr, “Thanks Doctor, I don’t know what we would have done without you.”

“Hey anytime.  Now, let’s get you home.


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Title: Pick up Techniques
Author:  Iantosdreamer46
Rating: R, adult themes, occasional language,
Pairings/Characters: Jack/Ianto,  Gwen/Rhys, Tosh/Owen,
Spoilers: None that I know of
Summary:  A new way to pick up someone in a bar!!
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters, they belong to RTD and the BBC.  I am just experimenting with them....
Written for the longliveianto bingo: My Best Friends An Alien - 1259 words


“So, come on then, who’s round is it this time?”

“Rhys don’t you ever give up?”

“No lover, not when you lot earn more than me!”

They laughed.  Owen extracted his arm from around Tosh’s shoulder.  “Think it’s my turn.”

They all nodded in approval.  A few months ago Owen would have done anything to get out of paying for a round.  But Tosh was slowly taming him and the rest of them were pleased to see how happy the couple were.

“Right, same again then is it?”

They all nodded in agreement.

As Owen was waiting at the bar something out the corner of his eye caught his attention.  He looked down to see a black rectangular box next to the bar stool he was perched on.  Slowly getting down, not wanting to draw attention to himself, he knelt to take a closer look.

The others had seen him bend down but couldn’t quite see what he was looking at or for.

“He must have dropped some money then.” Quipped Ianto “he’s the only man I know who’ll count every last penny in his pocket.  Go see what he’s lost Tosh, we’re dying of thirst here.”

“Ianto you can be cruel sometimes.”

“And you wouldn’t want me any other way!”

Jack leant over and whispered “I want you every way there is my love” and kissed him.

Before Tosh could see what was interesting Owen, he came across.  “Tosh I need your help.  There’s a box under that bar stool and….”

“And here we were thinking you’d dropped a penny!”

“Thanks tea boy, but I’m being serious, I don’t know what it is and I don’t want to panic everyone.  Tosh, can you scan it for me and tell me whether we need to be concerned.”

“No worries sweetheart”

Tosh went over to the bar and made out she’d dropped something.  Scanning the object she called Jack over.

“I can say that it’s definitely alien, but other than that, until I get it back to the Hub and do more tests, I can’t say anymore.”

“Right that settles it.  Ok gang sorry to break up the party, but we need to get this back.  Look it doesn’t need all of us.  Gwen, why don’t you take Rhys home….and, well, see what comes up!”

Rhys was just finishing the last of his pint when Jack’s comment caused him to splutter, choke and spray the drink over the table.

“Thanks Jack” smiled Gwen, “I’m sure we could find something to occupy ourselves.”  She leant over and kissed Rhys “couldn’t we love?”  They laughed at the shocked but pleased look on Rhys’ face.


Back at the Hub, Tosh was running checks on the box when a gap opened up in the side of it and out crawled what could only be described as a pixie.  The first person it saw was Owen, it made a type of high pitched squeak and launched itself at him, attaching tightly to his arm.

“Aaagh how sweet, Owens made a new friend!”

“Thanks tea boy, now will someone kindly remove this….this thing!  I want to get Tosh home for some much needed sleep.”

“Oh yeah, and you comment on our sleep patterns Dr Harper.  Are you sure that’s what you do?”

Jack saw Tosh blush, and thought how good being in love suited her.

“Thanks for that Jack.”

“My pleasure Owen.”

Tosh went to help Owen extract the creature from his arm.  But as she got near, it began hissing and her.  She moved away and it calmed down again.

“Look, try coming at it from the other direction.”

She tried again but still it hissed.

“Oh a jealous type!”

“Jack this is not funny.  Tosh try something to distract it.”

Tosh approached Owen from the other side and went to kiss him, thinking it would make the alien curious to what they were doing.  Wrong.  The second their lips touched, Owens new friend spat a blue slime at Tosh.

“Yeuk!  Thanks for that bright idea Owen.”

“Sorry lover, I’ll get you cleaned up once we get out of this situation.”

“Tosh move away from Owen, I want to try something.”

“Erm, Jack you’re not going to kiss me are you?”

“No Owen, I want to see its reactions when I get closer to you.”

Jack moved to the right side of Owen and went to pat the alien.  It began purring and appeared to be singing.  “Just as I thought.  It’s female!”

“Just how do you work that one out?”

“Look at the evidence.  It’s attached to you – male – Tosh approached you, it spat at her, I’ve just petted it, it’s now singing – definitely female.”

“Ok we’ve established it’s a she.  Now please can we get it off me, my arms going numb.”

“I have an idea.”

“Come on then, quickly, I do want to go home tonight.”

“Right, Ianto it’s going to let you get close so, sorry Owen this has to be done, I’m sorry Tosh.”

“Stop saying sorry and JUST GET ON WITH IT!  Whatever it is.”

Jack grinned “I’m just going to have to kiss you Owen!”

Tosh giggled, Owen spluttered and Ianto smiled a wicked smile.

“Oh you’re loving this aren’t you, I can see by the looks on your faces.”

“Well you will pick up strange women in bars!”

“Not anymore, not now I’ve got Tosh” and he smiled at his lover and made her blush again.

“Ready?  Are we ready?  As I go in for the kiss, Ianto you grab hold of it and pull.  Tosh you have the box ready and Owen….”



Jack moved closer, the creature began purring and humming louder.  Jack kissed Owen, Ianto went to pull the creature off, but before he could get hold of it a lightning bolt shot from an arm of the alien sending him across the Hub.  He crash landed against the corner of a desk.  He was gone.

“IANTO” Jack shouted as he left Owen and went to his lover.

“Ianto, sweetheart wake up.  Now look what you’ve done.  Are you satisfied?”

“Hey Jack, it wasn’t me!”

“I’m not talking to you Owen, I’m talking to….to….THAT!”

The creature turned its head and stopped purring.

“Look what you’ve done.  He’s done nothing to harm you.  Come on.  Look.  He’s all I have.  What are you going to do, what am I going to do, you’ve killed him.”

The alien looked from Owen to Jack to Ianto and appeared upset at the sight of a crumpled Ianto being cradled in Jack’s arms.

Tosh was too quick for it.  As it scurried past her she dropped its box on top, re-capturing it inside.

Jack kissed Ianto “Come on sweetheart, come back to me.”

“Nnnngh JACK!  What happened?”

“Owens new best friend thought you were female and attacked you when you tried to move it.”

“Mmmm but Jack, we both know I’m not female.”

“Oh yeah, and you can show me again later.”

“Oi, boys please, we’re still here.  We don’t want to know what you’re doing later.”

“Only, I suspect, what the pair of you will be doing.  Right Tosh?”

Tosh blushed again and went to kiss Owen.  “Mmmm sounds good to me” she whispered.

“Ok the pair of you, go home.  It’s been a long night, we’ll see you tomorrow.”


“Yes Ianto?”

“Don’t go picking up anymore strange women in bars!”

They all laughed except Owen as Tosh took his hand and took him home to bed.


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